Phil 2:3-4 "Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others."
That has verse gotten my attention today in light of a disagreement that didn't end until 1 am last night. I mean, isn't it excellent how in the heat of an argument we are able to pull out our mental Biblical Concordance and "A HA, I need to be humble here!" NOT! I love how Paul Washer handles the struggles of marriage, he asks "Why is marriage so difficult?" To which he answers, "because you're in it!" Sounds funny, but honestly, when looked at closely, it should shatter us to the core.
I've come to realize that behind marital conflict lingers the agenda of self. This isn't to dismiss the offenses done against us, but this is to say that when that offense occurs, do we forebear and forgive or do we act out a scene from our favorite war movie. Or better yet, you're Russell Crowe standing in the center of the Coliseum and you can feel the crowds breath as they yell "FINISH HIM!"
Its funny how our expectations of marriage are completely unrealistic, and continue to come out of movies we see, or stories we read. Notice how there is never really a romantic comedy that has a sequel updating the last 7 years of the barf worthy, sappy couples marriage? "Let each of you look NOT only to his OWN interest." Are we truly capable of this? Was the Apostle Paul out of his mind? Yes and no. Yes because we don't like the exhortation and no because it absolutely makes sense. Especially coming from a Christian perspective... Paul is basically saying, "See what was done on that Cross? Yeah? OK now in the heat of the argument, YOU do that!" Its all so easy to read and even quite easy to say, but last night I failed miserably. Paul tells us in Ephesians 4 not to let the sun go down on our anger, so instead of saying "Its 9pm, the sun was already down, I'll try tomorrow!" I should say "The SON, did go down and has risen, so let me put this anger to death." I must become like Ephesians 4:31 and "Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you."
Now what? I must go to my gorgeous bride, acknowledging that I am the chief of sinners, unworthy of a pardon and plead for forgiveness, in hopes that my short comings are over shadowed by the grace that God has given my wife, that we may be reconciled. Once again, God using my marriage to preach His gospel of reconciliation, to a broken sinner.
Prov 17:15 "He who justifies the wicked and he who condemns the righteous are both alike an abomination to the Lord."
2 Cor 5:21 "For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God."
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